The Intimacy Factor: The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth, Respect, and Lasting Love Paperback
Author: Visit Amazon's Pia Mellody Page - ISBN: 0060095806 - Language: English - Format: PDF, EPUB
DESCRIPTION
From Publishers Weekly
A certified addiction counselor and registered nurse, Mellody (Facing Codependence), writing with the assistance of Freundlich (president of Freundlich Communications), offers a self-help guide based on the role of spirituality in intimate relationships. As a recovering alcoholic, Mellody experienced a profound love coming to her from God; this supportive love led her to develop the fairly complex program that she currently uses while counseling clients. The author believes that many children are traumatized by parents who either shame (disempower) their children or force them into a parental role (falsely empower). Labeling both actions as abusive, Mellody provides examples of how children treated this way can recover and function more happily in the adult world. She details here how to erect healthy physical, emotional and intellectual boundaries that will foster rather than hamper intimacy and boost self-esteem. For example, she advises that affectionate approaches require controlled containment, e.g., when deciding to engage others in sexual intimacy, it is necessary to respect their physical boundaries by asking permission. In order to really communicate, people in close relationships should maintain other boundaries such as refraining from giving unasked-for advice, accusing or making judgments. Appended is an example of a "feeling reduction" workshop conducted at a residential treatment center where Mellody practices. According to the author, these workshops are central to overcoming trauma and abuse. Devotees of Mellody's earlier books will be the most interested in this latest offering.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Review
“A splendid example of her pioneering and cutting edge work....This book can change your life.” (John Bradshaw, author of the #1 New York Times bestellers Homecoming and Creating Love)
“With vast experience and insight, Pia Mellody continues to bring to her reader an empowering experience.” (--Claudia Black, Ph.D. author of It Will Never Happen To Me)
“...a wonderful book....very useful to those starting recovery to see the purpose of the language of boundaries.” (--Patrick Carnes, PhD, CAS, author of Out of the Shadows and Don't Call It Love)
“[Mellody] details here how to erect healthy...boundaries that will foster rather than hamper intimacy and boost self-esteem. (Publishers Weekly)
“With vast experience and insight, Pia Mellody continues to bring to her reader an empowering experience.” (--Claudia Black, Ph.D. author of It Will Never Happen To Me)
“...a wonderful book....very useful to those starting recovery to see the purpose of the language of boundaries.” (--Patrick Carnes, PhD, CAS, author of Out of the Shadows and Don't Call It Love)
“[Mellody] details here how to erect healthy...boundaries that will foster rather than hamper intimacy and boost self-esteem. (Publishers Weekly)
See all Editorial Reviews
DETAILS
- Paperback: 215 pages
- Publisher: HarperOne; Reprint edition (May 25, 2004)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0060095806
- ISBN-13: 978-0060095802
- Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.1 x 0.6 inches
- Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #12,956 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
REVIEWS
The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love Paperback Audible Download The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love on Amazon com FREE shipping on qualifying offers The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Download The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love Love The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love Love The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules For Overcoming The Obstacles To Truth Respect And Lasting LoveThe Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love Pia Mellody Lawrence S Freundlich digital library Bookfi The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to inside The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for The Obstacles To Truth Respect And Lasting Love The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love Paperback By Pia Mellody Author The Intimacy Factor The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth Respect and Lasting Love eBook Pia Mellody Lawrence S Freundlich Amazon it Kindle Store
Pia Mellody notes in the beginning of THE INTIMACY FACTOR that her deepest reason for writing the book was "to acknowledge the role of spirituality in intimate relationships." This is in itself is a worthy goal; spirituality (general, not within a specfic religious framework) as specifically applied to relationships is not addressed often enough, and it's a frequently forgotten part of too many partnerships. Mellody writes that true sprituality is the realization that God is Love and we can trust in that Love. That love is what restores to us the truth of our own inherent worth, thereby enabling us to have truly intimate relationships with other human beings.
Following an initial discussion along these lines, Mellody spends most of the rest of the book describing the concept of boundaries -- the "psychological passages" through which we both express our truth and recieve the emotions and words of others. She explains how functional boundaries lead to a spiritual relationship with God and good relationships with people, and the various ways in which dysfunctional boundaries can impair relationships. She also talks about how "boundary work" therapy helps to restore boundaries to healthy function.
Mellody's descriptions of boundaries are both interesting and very useful -- you can really see where how your own boundaries are functioning (or not) and what you can do to improve them. However, she ascribes all boundary dysfunction to myriad possible forms of abuse in childhood (often more subtle than your stereotypical drunken and physcially abusive parent.) While this is interesting and helpful as well, I think it is a stretch to say that ALL relationship problems stem from childhood abuse. Does everyone have abusive parents?
PREVIEW
The Intimacy Factor DOWNLOAD
No comments:
Post a Comment